Tuesday, March 3, 2009

So Bad I Would Have Walked Out of My Living Room

I think I have walked out on one movie in my life.  It was the movie Loser and it was so painful that me and like the 17 people I was with all just up and left when we couldn't take it any longer. 

I am such a movie fan that a movie has to be pretty bad for me to stop watching.  Which is why I am a bit perplexed about my movie choices lately.  While I am careful with what I order from NetFlix, I am not so discerning when it comes to what I watch on ON DEMAND for free.  The past few days I have seen a few titles that I thought "Hey, it's better than watching reality TV" and turned on, only to stop watching after 20 minutes or so.

Fist Up: Resurrection Mary

I was pretty excited when I saw this movie was on since it is based on one of my favorite ghost tales from the Chicago area.  Unfortunately this low-budget blooper didn't do the story any justice and I never made it past the first act.

Second Movie:  Be Kind, Rewind

Rarely can you go wrong with a Jack Black movie.  And throw in the quality that is Mos Def, some Danny Glover and the chick that used to be married to Woody Allen and it's gold.  Unless you package it all together into this atrocity about re-filming VHS movies after a magnetized Jack Black erased them all.  Too bad they didn't follow their own plot and do so with this.

Third Movie:  Over Her Dead Body

I love Paul Rudd.  I have a total crush on him.  Especially when he is running with with Apatow crowd.  But sadly I don't think he is cut out to be a leading man, which he proves in this movie.  Of course, trying to picture Mr. Adorable with a bitchy Eva Longoria Parker didn't help the plot.

Come on Hollywood!  Why are you greenlighting crap like this when there are thousands of better ideas out there?  Send me a self addressed stamped envelope and I will prove it to you by sending you one of my scripts which you can make into a movie and I will give you my guarantee that it will earn more money than these four combined.

~The Office Scribe

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